Queenslog, Stardate May 15
It’s a been few weeks since I checked in. Thank you for waiting!
I went through a pandemic without so much as a head cold. A month after I got vaccinated, I got bronchitis. Two weeks later I’m still coughing here and there. Ugh.
Here’s what’s happening in my Queendom:
**My public transportation dreams are coming true. I’m finishing up the policy manuals this weekend. Shout out to the folks at Mountain Rides, the Shoshone School District and ITD who have been sending policies so I don’t have to “reinvent the wheel”. I had an amazing meeting with Kim and CeCe from Mountain Rides the other day. We have some fun ideas for making my rural public transportation dreams a reality. Stay tuned.
**The Youth Center is ticking along at a lightning-fast pace. The AmeriCorps team has the interior painted. Next week, they’ll start pulling carpets and getting ready for new flooring. We hired a VISTA volunteer to get the administration office up and running. We are going to run a couple of day camps this summer just to test out the building and what we might need. They include science and drama camp and an event we’re calling “Jam sessions” – where we will be teaching beginner jam making while local musicians “jam”. We are also looking at a "Trashion" Show where the kids making up-cycled clothing from recycled goods. We were inspired by a project we heard about in Hailey. Can’t wait to give it a shot.
**My hubby and I are celebrating 25-years of marriage this month. We’ve learned over the years we vacation really well…separately. So, this weekend, he’s with his fraternity brothers golfing his way across the Pacific Northwest. I’m at my retreat castle. (My personal Balmoral). It’s blissfully quiet here. The morning has been filled with an eclectic playlist and two cups of the best tea I’ve made for myself in a long time. (The kind where you take a sip and think, “Fuck ya”.) I’m reading a good book and have two flats of plants to get in the ground. All in all, the makings of a perfect weekend.
**While I was sick, I wrapped up my 30-days of not saying negative things about myself. Let me tell you, this has been eye opening and maybe one of the most liberating things I’ve ever done. We put ourselves down so much in this society, we don’t even notice. But you know who does notice? Our cells. Our soul. Our body does not know we’re joking. Your body just absorbs the toxins of hatred and loathing. It’s not healthy at any level.
Comedian Hannah Gadsby says it best. “We put ourselves down in order to seek permission to speak. It’s not humility, it’s humiliation.”
I know I put myself down in order to make myself more accessible to people uncomfortable with who I am or what I look like. I refuse to do it anymore.
This exercise has also made me so much more comfortable in my skin I’ve actually started to fall in love with my body – something I’ve never been able to say or do before. It occurs to me we’ve been taught to make ourselves smaller, to make ourselves less than human in order to fit into someone else’s ideal. Who sets those standards? The fashion industry? The entertainment industry? Who the hell decided they were in charge? I’m in charge of my time, my passions, my body. And here’s the shocker. I’m human. We’re all human. And humans have scars and stretch marks and rolls and cellulite. It’s high time, I think, to accept each other’s humanity.
Not just accept it, celebrate it. I’ll be writing more about this in the Members Only area, but seriously, let’s let each other be human. Let’s allow people to express their humanity the way they choose. For me that means I’m no longer going to try to make myself smaller to fit someone else’s ideal. I will no longer be covering up the parts of myself that I’ve been told are unacceptable. I will be celebrating all that I am and allowing myself the grace to know that I don’t need to be perfect in anyone’s eyes but my own.
I think you should do the same.
Be well, be blessed.
What I'm reading: The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by VE Schwab
What I'm listening to; This amazing play list